


Ain't That A Bitch

by Gnilnim27



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Unvierse - band au, Angst, Fluff, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-10
Updated: 2014-01-10
Packaged: 2018-01-08 06:02:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 15,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1129186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gnilnim27/pseuds/Gnilnim27
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Avengers band au where where Tony and the gang are in a band and Thor and Loki and the Warriors Three are in another band. Until Loki decides to leave....</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by these wonderful artworks 
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> http://angla8011.deviantart.com/art/Avengers-Thor-317681156
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> and
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> http://angla8011.deviantart.com/art/Avengers-Stark-316453590
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> I don't know anything about bands or what the hell they do except sing and play drums and shit so please pardon any wrong details. Enjoy!

The florescent lights reflected back in a harsh white brightness as it hit the glass. Beyond the glass, Loki watched his brother and his band moving energetically to the pounding of drums and guitars. From where he was lying on the couch, they seem to be floating, playing enthusiastically on the wall rather than on the floor. The recording studio was sound-proofed but he didn’t need to hear anything to know they were butchering yet another one of his beautifully crafted pieces. 

 

The dark haired man took a drag from the weed between pale fingers as he shifted on the uncomfortably polyester sofa and turned to face the dark wood ceiling. He exhaled and watch as the wisps of white smoke swirled and twirled up to the air.

 

He had an idea, which started as a small voice in the back of his mind, now it was screaming at him and giving him a headache. Loki sat up and took another drag and forged calmness as he composed his mind. Now up right, the sideway view of his brother in this parallel illusion seemed to shatter. 

 

As he snubbed out the joint, Loki came to a conclusion. He stood and reached for the violin case at his feet, and looked up at the blonde man on the other side of the glass. From the recording room, Thor smiled at him as he rifted through the chorus in a comical show for his brother. Loki smiled back a little despondently.

 

The older Odinson came out of the recording room with a grin on his face. The sharp look Loki gave him did nothing to dampen the pleased gleam in his eyes. ‘What did you think?’ he asked.

 

Loki took his time answering. Thor’s smile dimmed and his hands outstretch in an invitation for praise, drifted slowly to his sides instead. 'You do know that that room is sound prove, right?’ Loki stated, folding his arms across his chest defensively. ‘Whatever, your opinion clearly always overrides mine anyhow.’

 

Thor blinked. Loki sighed. It was futile to explain to Thor how long he had spent on the composition or how long he sat, making sure the lyrics to the song had just that touch melancholy. He didn’t even know why he bothered because Thor would always have some sort of ‘improvement’ to make.

 

‘Loki---’ Thor started to say.

 

‘I wish you all the best,’ Loki said and walked out the room.

 

\--

 

Tony stirred as the warm sunlight shone piercingly bright behind his eyelids. He groaned and turned away from the offending light, burying his head into his pillow. A small marching band was doling out through his head. Bells, drums, whistles and all.

 

‘Go awayawrgerrr…,’ his moan muffled by the fluffy pillow.

 

'Suffocation, Stark? If I sang a song like “We Did a Thing”, I’d suffocate myself too,’ a female voice remarked. To Tony it sounded like a whole chorus of singers was belting out the words from bass to soprano, the clicking of her heels about his room sounded like a small army of approaching horses. 

 

He huffed and rolled over to face the source of his current misery, and got a newspaper flying smack into his face for all his trouble. ‘Wa-What?’

 

‘Read,’ the fiery red-head said. She had her arms crossed in front of her as she stalked up to the foot of Tony’s bed. Never had a midnight blue satin blouse and charcoal pencil skirt look more intimidating. Unfortunately this was a hangover Tony Stark and it was all but lost on him.

 

He took the paper up and squinted at it and saw the words but it just seemed like too much work to have them make sense. He saw the words “mindlessly sexual”, “cheap” and “repetitive”.

 

‘Hmm,’ he said, before flopping back into his pillows.

 

“Hmm”? “Hmm”, that’s it?’ the woman asked, she didn’t sound all that surprised or even angry. In anything, she sounded curious. ‘I know you said that Pepper was the only one who could write songs that you wanted to sing, but she’s been married to Happy for 3 years now and you have to start looking for a lyricist.’

 

Tony bolted up unhappily, a move which he quickly regretted as he felt whatever that was left over from last night slosh and sucker punch his innards. ‘Are you saying that I can’t write, Natasha?’ he rasped, it was not his proudest moment but it was neither was it his worst and that in itself was a score in Tony’s book.

 

‘No, you can write songs but they’re just not songs that will win you anything at the music awards,’ Natasha replied sounding concerned as she watched the messy dark haired man roll off the bed. ‘Tony, you know they suck, even if you don’t admit it. You need a lyricist.’

 

Tony groaned as he crouched on all fours on his bedroom’s plush carpet. ‘Ok… Fine, when do we start?’

 

Natasha smiled all sweet poison and danger, ‘Great. Oh, you also might want to think about finding Happy’s replacement.’

 

‘Don’t you have a list for me, Miss Manager?’ Tony asked as he stumbled into his bathroom.  
‘If you want one, yes. But you and I both know that you’re never one for lists,’ Natasha said as she set herself down on the edge of the bed and checked her cell phone.

 

Tony closed the cabinet above his sink and stared at his blood-shot eyes in the mirror, glaring at Natasha’s reflection as she blasted “We Did A Thing” from her handphone. ‘I hate you,’ he murmured. 

 

\--

 

Thor opened the bedroom door; it was dark, the bed was neatly made, corners tucked in. Thor closed the bedroom door and climbed out to the fire escape, up the rickety iron ladder and onto the rooftop of their building. There he saw the barbeque pit, their three lawn chairs and a lone umbrella, looking depressingly grey in the morning light.

 

He sighed and climbed back down, returned to his apartment and wandered into the kitchen. He kneelt down and examined the food and water bowl, they were both still filled to the brim and untouched. It was curious. Thor picked up the phone and called the one person he knew that could make sense of it all.

 

‘Mother,’ Thor said, one hand on the handphone and the other fidgeting absently at the notes suck on the fridge. Buy milk, toilet paper and jam. Dentist appointment, cancelled.  
‘Hello, dear,’ Frigga replied between yawns. ‘Has something happened?’

 

‘How did you know?’ her son asked, perplexed as he peeked into the dark bedroom again.  
‘It’s two in the morning in London, and you know that…,’ his mother said. Beside her, Odin stirred and mumbled something incoherent, ‘Or you would know that if you weren’t so distracted. What happened, Thor?’ 

 

‘Mother, it’s Loki,’ Thor replied as he opened the cupboard in the bedroom and was distressed to find that most of Loki’s signature dark coloured clothes were still there.

 

‘Oh, no. Should I hide all the newspapers from your father again?’ Frigga asked, raising from her bed and moving farther away from her sleeping husband to stand beside the window.

 

‘No, no, mother. It’s nothing like that, it just that Loki hasn’t come home a few days and… I can’t seem to get hold of him,’ Thor said as he now turned his attention to Loki’s books, perhaps his brother kept a journal or a dairy.

 

There was a thoughtful silence from his mother.

 

‘Should I try the police stations?’

 

‘No, at least not yet… What was the last thing he said to you, love?’

 

‘I-I don’t remember, I think he was talking about music?’

 

‘Thor, is Fenris with you?’ Frigga asked, Loki could and would leave everything behind, but he would never leave his dog. There was a long pause on the other end of the line as Thor processed what his mother was implying, the book he was holding slipped from his fingers and landed with a painfully loud thud. 

 

‘I have to find him,’ Thor said, Frigga frowned and was about to advice against it but Thor had already hung up on her. His mother sighed, behind her Odin grumbled, ‘What has he done this time?’

 

Loki stood at a corner of the subway station with his dark green hoodie pulled over his head as he tucked his violin under his chin, his pale fingers wet and cold from being rained on outside. He closed his eyes, thought about the cold, the rain and the ever persistent ache in his heart and stuck the first note across his strings.

 

He pulled on his fiddle as if he were pulling on his very own heart, at his feet; Fenris lay across his shoes and whined sadly. Loki slid his fingers down the violin neck and inveigled low and mournful sounds from his instrument. Passer-bys quickly filled his violin case with loose change, casting him forlorn looks as they walked pass. Then he rushed into an angry crescendo of staccato tunes. 

 

\--

 

There was something about public transport that Tony hated but, with Jarvis running the café, he couldn’t expect the man to drive him around. Sure, he could drive himself around but in many a brutal truth, public transport was more efficient. 

 

Today he had been rained on, and water was dripping down his neck. His leather jacket could only keep so much of him dry. His felt a cold coming on and according to the papers, his music still sucked and The Avengers was a fucking joke. At least his baseball cap and sunglasses was keeping him from being recognized, he had that going for him. He stalked down the subway unhappily and then he heard it.

 

It was a faint sound, almost threatened to be drowned by all the noise of people walking and talking. It was a sad melancholy tune, which felt like something Tony could rock up if he had his guitar and it would still sound beautiful. He followed the tune like a siren call. It was violin music and it got louder as he got closer. He saw, not too far away, a hooded figure busking with a violin. 

 

His elegant pale fingers danced across the violin’s neck like a lover’s caress. It was sensual and gratifying to look at. The violinist ended his song with a slow soft drag across his strings and Tony was charmed. 

‘Wow,’ he said as he clapped. The other man smiled from under his hood. It was a sly smile, the smile of someone who knew how good he was and knew exactly what he was doing. ‘Do you do weddings and funerals?’

 

‘Hah, very funny,’ the man replied in an accented voice that was both warm and cutting all at once. Tony decided that he quite liked the man.

 

‘Hey,’ Tony said as the man put the violin back under his chin and was about to start another song, ‘Did you compose all that?’

 

The man’s fiddle paused in mid stroke. ‘Yes…,’ he said slowly and suspiciously.

 

‘You write lyrics?’ the older man asked.

 

‘Yes, I do,’ the violinist replied, he had lowered his fiddle and had turned his full attention to Tony.

 

Tony smiled blindingly as he pulled off his cap and sunglasses. ‘Tony Stark of The Avengers. I would love to have you on board.’ The violinist pulled off his hood to reveal a familiar slender face, green eyes and dark hair. 

 

‘Would you still take me now, Mr Stark? If I did already belong to another band?’ Loki asked, he wore a smile that told Tony that he was used to rejection and wasn’t expecting much form him.

 

Tony grinned even wider, bordering on maniacal. ‘I love wrecking bands! Mr Odinson, welcome to The Avengers!’

 

\--

 

‘No, Tony! We cannot keep him!’ Clint yelled across the dining table as he pointed an accusing finger at the pale dark haired man that sat on Tony’s left. On either side of Clint, Bruce and Natasha maintained some semblance of civility. Natasha thought tight lipped was poised and Bruce had his tired strained look on.

 

‘Keep? Am I a pet now? Should Tony collar and leash me?’ Loki asked with a smirk, beside him Tony covered his mouth with his hand to hide his laughter. 

 

‘Clint, the man’s bloody good at what he does, you know that!’ Tony said, trying to sound reasonable. Considering that he was facing with his fuming bass player who could really pack a punch, he felt that he was doing pretty well.

 

‘This man is a loose canon! He just only defected from his former band, who knows what else he would do?! For all we know he’s a spy!’ Clint shouted as he stood up so fast that he knocked his chair over. 

 

Loki raised an unimpressed eyebrow then laced his fingers together in fringed concern. ‘Oh, Barton, don’t tell me you’re still hung up over that little prank from yesteryear?’

 

Clint, when red in the face, he looked like the human manifestation of Vesuvius just before it flattened Pompeii. At which point, Bruce quickly stood up and took a firm grip of his friend’s arm. ‘Remember the breathing technique, Clint? In out, in out,’ he man said soothingly.

 

‘Mr Odinson, are you sure that you’re not violation any contracts or crossing anyone by choosing to join The Avengers?’ Natasha said. She was using her-don’t-fuck-with-me-or-you'll-wake-up-in-an-alley-somewhere-castrated voice. 

 

Loki smiled idly. ‘I’ve reviewed my contact, so no; you don’t have to worry about getting served with anything. As for crossing people on the other hand… Well, isn’t that what this whole industry is about?’

 

The red-head glared pointedly at Loki then smiled. It was a sharp kind of smile, not unlike the ones certain feral cats have before they ripped out your throat. Loki’s returning smile was not any better. While Natasha’s promised hellfire; Loki’s could ice hell over. 

 

‘Ok!’ Tony said a cheerily as he smacked his hands together. ‘Let’s find us a drummer!’

\--

 

Tony had not felt like this in years, he was excited, his veins humming with a nervous energy as he lead his new lyricist to his apartment. He tossed Loki’s bag, a very very light dufle bag across the room where it slid across his oakwood floor and hit the television cabinet.

 

‘Voilà! Home sweet home!’ Tony announced as he spun around, arms spread out in presentation of the apartment. Loki adjusted his grip on Fenris in his arms as he eyed the clean white walls, smooth white marble coffee table and stainless steel kitchen which he bet the older man had never used in his life.

 

‘Erm…,’ he said, unsure of what to say. On one hand he was stunned when Tony offered him his apartment to stay; on the other hand, the older man had made it quite clear that he may be an even worst pet owner than Thor. Fearing for the safety of his only family left, Loki said, ‘It’s very nice but I think I’ll pass.’

 

‘Oh, come one, Loki! You can’t stay in motel rooms for ever!’ Tony said as his arms dropped dejectedly, then suddenly there was a sly glim in his brown eyes. ‘Besides, what kind of message would we be sending to your brother if you stayed out? Or better yet, what kind of message would we be sending if you stayed here?’

 

Loki winced. That statement felt strangely insulting but Loki made no comment on it because whatever which confused Thor was a good thing… right? Right. 

 

Loki sighed and let Fenris down to explore his new home. He watched the puppy sniff curiously at the leg of a leather sofa, for a moment both Loki and Tony tensed but the dog soon lost interest and wondered on. Fenris suddenly paused in the middle of the room and turned back to look at Loki, his usually perk ears dropping slightly and his huge eyes looked forlorn and distressed.

 

‘Wow,’ Tony said, eyes wide as he looked down at the black ball of fur currently standing in his kitchen. ‘That’s a great impression of your older brother right there.’

 

The younger man frowned; he’d never really thought of it that way but damn Tony was right. Fenris did look like Thor, he should have never allowed the man to run Fenris, but how was he to know Thor-ness was catching?

 

‘He’s probably hungry,’ Loki said, changing the subject as fast as he could. He fished around the bag for what was left of the dog food, making a mental note to buy more soon. Tony helpfully put out a steel bowl which he had fished out for the depths of his cabinet on the floor by the counter for the dog. Fenris walked over to the bowl, stared at it and simply continued staring.

 

‘You sure he’s hungry?’ Tony asked. He may be no dog expert but the way the pup hung his head and his upright ears dropping ever so slightly told him that his pup was sad.

 

The younger man groaned as he collapsed his thin frame into a bar stool and threw an arm over his eyes in defeat. ‘He will eat… eventually when the hunger over comes him… if not I’ll have to cook him something again. Regardless, it is important to maintain a familiar schedule to counteract the… change…’

 

Tony frowned as he watched the dog flop down beside his bowl and the creature cast a forlorn upwards glance at him before letting out a high pitched whine. ‘Are you telling me that your boy here… missed his other daddy?’ Tony asked in disbelief feeling a very in appropriate laughter bubbling to the surface. 

 

‘Well, Thor… is a good owner in some aspects. He walks Fenris, actually remember to buy dog food, he washes the dog as he washes himself…,’ Loki said, far from sounding grateful to his brother he sounded wretched as if Thor had cursed him for being good to his dog. Tony shuffled his feet awkwardly. He couldn’t see the younger man’s expression and was glad for it. ‘DAMN that brute!’ Loki cursed.

\--

 

The drums pounded in a wild pace. Rhythm addictive; the bass, guitar and keyboard in sync. Together, all four instruments rushed to reach some sort of harmony. The lead guitar thrummed a beat too fast for a moment, and the rest of the pieces struggled and tumbled over one another. The arrangement tripped and tumbled down hill after that.

 

Finally, it was Thor’s strings that gave up the ghost as they snapped with a painful zing that vibrated throughout that room before despairing in a low embarrassed hum. Both Hogan’s fingers paused on his guitar and Fandral froze at his keyboard, the last resonating sound was Volstagg’s percussion clashing.

 

The three men took in their friend’s composure, his slumped shoulders and defeated air. Volstagg looked at Hogan expectantly, the shorter man in turn turned to look at Fandral who sighed and made his way to Thor. He carefully placed his hand on their friend’s shoulder.  
‘Thor, he’ll come back. You know he always does,’ Fandral said.

 

Thor stared at the broken strings of the guitar in his hands, ‘You speak of him as if he were a pet,’ Thor remarked. It was not angry, not even loud but it took Fandral aback all the same.

 

‘I didn’t mean it like that…,’ Fandral replied angstly. He threw a look over his shoulder at his comrades for help but the duo had suddenly found a new fascination in their instruments. He shot them a glare.

 

‘Was this why he left? Did we treat him so badly and not even know it?’ Thor asked, he was wracked with guilt and worry.

 

‘What?! God, no! You know how we are, and we’re not exactly mean. If anyone is agonizing anyone else it’s Loki agonizing us with all his pranks!’ the smaller man replied scandalized at the thought.

 

‘Then why?’ Thor demanded, everyone in the room fell silent for a moment as Thor eyed them all.

 

‘I think it’s you,’ Hogan said softly as he busied himself with tuning his bass guitar. Fandral smacked his palm over his eyes and Thor stared in disbelief; only Volstagg seemed unphased as he produced a doughnut to munch on.

 

‘Its not---’ Fandral started in a feeble attempt to explain the awkwardness away.  
At the very same moment Thor said, ‘I need to find Loki.’

 

The man dumped his guitar into Fandral’s arms and stormed out of the recording room and out of the studio into the rain.

\--

 

Loki was not one to be shocked easily but at this moment he was. Sitting along a narrow table with Natasha on his left and Stark on his right, followed by Clint and Bruce after Stark, they all stared jaw slacked as the drummer in front of them finished with a horrendous clank. The heavily pierced youth grinned hopefully at them as he twirled his drumsticks. 

 

Tony blinked and shook his head, ‘NEXT!’

 

The incomplete Avengers gathered their scattered wits as the now angry drummer left and Loki was the first of them to recover. 

 

‘Stark, we will listen to no more!’ Loki said sternly with his fist clenched so tight his knuckles turned white.

 

Tony opened his mouth to protest but was cut off by Clint who added angrily, ‘I may not usually agree with the bastard but at this moment I will shoot you in the butt if I have to hear another drummer!’

 

‘You’re one to talk!’ Tony snapped.

 

‘You’ve seen 52 drummers, at this rate I would think you’re trying to be deliberately difficult,’ Natasha berated him as she took a viscous stab at her Ipad.

 

‘Tony. Please, please consider seeing my therapist. You need to know when to let go…,’ 

 

Bruce pleaded from the far right of the table, much to Tony’s annoyance. Tony rolled his eyes and stood up irritated.

 

‘Fine! Have it your way, and don’t come whining to me when you don’t have a drummer!’ he shot back as he grabbed his jacket and left.

 

The band sat and stared as their lead singer diva-ed his way out of the audition room, after a beat Natasha said, ‘So, who’s going to go after him?’ while looking along the table expectantly.

 

\--

 

Thor couldn’t believe his eyes when he found his brother, Loki, across the street. He had a harder time believing it when he saw the man he was tailing after, the infamous Tony Stark. He had been looking for his brother in all the familiar places but here he was, following the worst singer in the history of music.

 

Not wanting to be spotted, Thor bought a baseball cap from a street stall and forced the ill fitted thing on. He almost bulked when Tony turned to look over his shoulder, but it was Loki who ducked into the shadows of a nearby shop. He followed Loki, following Tony until Tony entered a bar and Loki disappeared.

 

Thor leaned against a newspaper stand and busied himself with the paper while trying to inconspicuously look out for where his brother was. A minute later Tony Stark marched out of the bar furious and Loki emerged from the bar’s back door looking gleeful, not unlike the times when he was causing mischief.

 

This carried on for the several bars, each time resulting with a steadily angrier Tony and the stealthy disappearing and reappearing of Loki from the back doors and side doors of bars. Thor could not make sense of it, it seemed that Tony Stark appeared to be equally as confused too.

 

Soon the man gave up and wondered into a small vintage looking record shop instead. Thor looked away from Stark and found that his brother had disappeared once again. Sighing, Thor turned to leave only to find himself face to face with a pair of irritated green eyes.  
‘Hello, Thor. Stalker much?’ the younger man asked, but his voice was not without amusement.

 

Spots of red danced high in Thor’s cheeks at first but he quickly remembered himself and glared angrily. ‘Oh, you mean like you were with Tony Stark?!’  
Loki’s lips tighten, he couldn’t very well say that he was only following Stark to make sure that the man’s old habits stayed dead after losing a game of rock paper scissors with his new band members. 

 

‘I follow who I want, when I want. It is of no concern to you,’ he said and turned to leave.  
Thor’s hand shot out reflexively and gripped at Loki’s slender wrist. ‘It is of my concern when you haven’t been home for days if not weeks! It is of my concern when you are my BROTHER!’ 

 

‘If I were NOT your brother I wouldn’t be any of your concern then would I?!’ Loki yelled back as he ripped his hand away from Thor’s grip

 

‘What?!’ Thor asked, renewing his grip on the younger man’s arm.  
Loki looked conflicted for an instant; the he renewed his effort in shaking this brother off. ‘Let go of me and go home, you oaf! You already turned my own dog against me, have you not caused me enough misery?!’ 

 

‘No! NO, I will not! Not till you start telling me the truth! Loki, for ONCE will you please be forward and stop talking in circles! What are you doing and what is happening to Fenris?!’ Thor demanded as they struggled on the sidewalk, attracting nervous glances from the people around them.

 

‘Unhand me, you idiotic brute! I will talk in circle if only to infuriate you!’ Loki snapped, aggravated and cornered he took a swing at the taller man.

 

\--

 

Tony looked up from the Queens record in his hands. Funny, he thought he had heard Loki screaming. Unconcerned, he turned his attention back to the record in his hands as Loki and Thor tumbled passed the window of the Stars and Stripes record store.

 

‘I’m sorry, but we’re closing soon,’ a figure whose face was behind a stack of boxes he was carrying, said apologetically. Tony smiled as he set down the Queens record and made his way up to the other man and his hands full of boxes. 

 

‘Well now, Steve. You’re not about to chase away your star customer are you?’ Tony asked as he reached out to help free the man of a few boxes.

 

Steve smiled ruefully, ‘Sometimes I feel like you’re my only customer.’

 

The boxes in Tony’s arms clanked as he moved to place them on the counter. He paused, then shook the boxes some more. The slide of metal against metal was unmistakable.  
Tony looked up at Steve, shocked. ‘A-are these pieces of a drum set?’

 

‘Yes, they are,’ the younger man replied. He hesitated before asking, ‘Would you like to buy them?’

 

‘W-What?!’ Tony asked appalled and more than a little distressed. Behind them Loki made a mad dash pass the window with Thor following quickly at his heel. The two men blinked and paused.

 

‘Tony was that---’ Steve asked with a curious frown as a hoard of people stampeded pass the window screaming for Thor and Loki, several voices aggressively demanding for a picture. 

 

‘NO IDEA!’ Tony said quickly, annoyed at the momentary distraction. ‘The more important question is that you play?!’

 

‘Err, yes?’ Steve replied, tearing his eyes away from the window to meet the erratic and slightly maniacal twinkle had made itself know in Tony’s eyes. 

 

‘Like playing drums with sticks? An actual drum?’’ Tony asked, excitedly. Steve frowned, his concern growing. ‘But why sell it?’

 

Steve sighed, ‘It’s not easy running a vintage record store, Tony. All people want to listen to are––well, honestly I don’t get those “popular” songs and I don’t play them either.’

 

Tony’s smile was taking on a dangerous edge now, ‘Steve, what if I told you could save your store and keep your drums?’

 

The grin Steve gave him made Tony’s heart leap. ‘Really?’ Steve said, sounding confused but hopeful. Then the smile slid away. ‘Oh, Tony,’ he said firmly. ‘I don’t want your money.’

 

Tony managed not to flinch but it still hurt that Steve thought he was trying to buy him off. Because when had Tony ever used his money to buy his way into someone’s heart? When was Tony the kind of guy to lavish unnecessary giant stuff toys or super fast cars on the object of his––oh. Oh. ‘Huh,’ said Tony softly.

 

He was quiet long enough for Steve to really worry. ‘Tony, I didn’t mean to––'

 

‘What? No. No. It’s fine. Cause, you know, you’re right. Not that I would not––but that wasn’t what I was going to say at all. But I don’t blame you for thinking I would do that, uh, stuff. Just that I don’t anymore, not since, well, I mean there’s still the charity donations––not that you are a charity thing, no, not a charity case, not at all.’

 

Steve gave his shoulder a squeeze and Tony’s mouth snapped shut like they were connected somehow. ‘Tony, slow down,’ Steve said. He looked amused more than anything else, the weight of his hand warm and comfortable. Then Steve was taking his hand back and Tony wanted to splutter in protest. 

 

‘So…’ Steve said, stacking up his dismantled drum set now that he seemed to think Tony wasn’t interested in buying it. ‘What were you actually trying to say?’

 

‘I need a drummer.’

 

Steve paused, looking skeptical. ‘For your band? What about Happy?’

 

Tony shrugged. ‘He’s a family man now, remember?’ Steve probably heard enough about Happy and Pepper to write their biographies, given that the number of times he had met them in person could be counted in one hand.

 

Steve walked to the door to flip the sign to ‘CLOSE’ with Tony trailing behind him, saying, ‘I’m thinking about giving the Avengers the ol’ makeover. And I think that you would be a great addition to the team.’

 

‘I’m, uh, flattered, honestly,’ Steve replied, all wry smile and blue eyes. He picked up a pad with a list of items sold. Tony couldn’t help noticing that the list was glaringly short. ‘Tony, you’ve never even heard me play.’

 

‘So come to the auditions. And audition.’ When Steve didn’t respond immediately, Tony grabbed the pad and whisked out a pen from his pocket. ‘Look, just show up. I don’t care if you hate everything after the 70s.’

 

Steve scowled and cross his arms. ‘I don’t hate—’

 

‘Except classic rock. You can’t hate rock.’ He looked up from the address of the studio they’d used for auditions and met Steve’s eyes. ‘You don’t, do you?’

 

After a minute of trying to look annoyed, Steve shrugged and smiled. ‘Okay. Sure. What’s there to lose, right? Carpe diem!’ he said, shouting the last word before bursting out in laughter at his own private joke.

 

Tony found himself grinning, eyes tracking the way Steve’s shoulders shook. He handed the pad back to Steve, mouth suddenly dry. “I’ll see you tomorrow. At ten. In the morning. Okay? Right… bye.” And dashed out of the shop, his heart hammering in his chest. 

 

\--

 

Loki’s phone vibrated in his jeans for the 100th time that morning, he fished it out of his pocket and ended that call without even looking at the screen. Beside him, Natasha looked over in mild concern but Loki’s face betrayed nothing. Sighing, she turned back to watch the next drummer to try his luck. 

The man who entered was oddly neat, clean shaven and tattoo free. He was tall, blond, well-built and had a shy, slightly goofy smile on. Loki hated him immediately. The new comer made the vibrating phone in his pocket that much harder to ignore.

 

‘Hi, I’m Steve Rogers and I’m going to play an arrangement of my own, if you don’t mind?’ he said, his eyes were looking straight at Tony for some odd reason. Both Loki and Natasha noticed but only Natasha was attentive enough to care. She gave Tony a warning look, the older man ignored her and proceed to give the drummer wannabe a thumb’s up. 

 

The next three minutes were the strangest and most wonderful three minutes of their lives. The would be drummer Steve was so good that Loki almost forgot he hated him. Everyone begin sitting up a little straighter, it was like being told that unicorns exist and then actually seeing it.

 

“Well, that’s me,” he said sheepishly when he finished. Everyone blinked, even Tony was taken by surprise.

 

‘Wow!’ Clint said, he leaned back in his chair regarding the man before him like he wasn’t quite sure what to make of Steve.

 

‘That was brilliant!’ Bruce said in awe, ‘Old timey but damn you’re good!’

 

‘Yes… but that’s the problem, how would he fit into the group, Tony?’ Natasha asked, stressing hard on Tony’s name. She seemed to be sharing Clint’s opinion on the matter like they so often did, but unlike Clint she was actively disapproving. In fact, she appeared to be particularly prickly that morning.

 

Tony grinned like the loon he could be and simply couldn’t care less as he said, ‘Loki will find a way, won’t you, Loki?’

 

‘Loki?’ he called again when the dark haired man appeared to have not heard him.

 

‘Hmm? Oh, right. Of course, my magical touch can turn even the turdiest of assembles into gold,’ Loki said, but his reply lacked the bite it should have had, instead he sounded distracted and tired. Bruce, Tony and Natasha exchange glances, even Clint frowned. 

 

‘Err… is he ok?’ Steve asked, Loki was looking at his phone again with a scowl.

 

‘He will be,’ Tony said, turning back to Steve with a smile. ‘So, welcome to The Avengers!’

 

\-- 

 

Thor did not know how time could pass both slowly and quickly at the same time. He came home, tired from chasing Loki and running away from the mass of crazed fans and paparazzi but it was almost impossible to stop the wheels in his head from spinning. He finally understood what Loki was writing about in all his depressing songs.

 

Here he lay on his brother’s bed… or was he his brother? When he thought about it, it was painfully obvious, but for some reason or other Thor couldn’t wrap his mind around it. As he watched the fan overhead spin, the idea that Loki wasn’t his brother kept slipping through his grasp like sand.

 

The sharp ringing of his phone shook him out if his reverie. Thor continued to lie on his back, not moving for a moment because he knew who he wished it would be but he also knew it wouldn’t be. The ringing when on persistently and showed no signs of dying out. Finally, Thor rolled over for his phone with a groan.

 

‘Yes?’ Thor said, tiredly.

 

‘Turn on the telly, NOW!’ Fandral said on the other end of the phone, his friend had not sounded this urgent since Sif ended up in the hospital after a bar brawl. Thor quickly set up, reached for Loki’s remote and turned on the small tv set in the corner of the room.

 

The screen flickered to life with the image of The Avengers' press conference. Among the people seated at the table was a new fresh faced blond man and Loki, Thor was stunned. The phone slipped from his hands and fell to the floor.

 

‘So, Tony, I’m Avengers’ biggest fan! Is it---’ an overly excited and slightly crazed looking young man yelled from the crowd of press personnel.

 

He was cut short with a glare and a stern word from Natasha, ‘Wade Wilson, you can only ask three questions that was the deal so choose them wisely.’ 

 

‘Noted, your royal hotness!’ the young man chirped, beside him a bespectacled brunet rolled his eyes and tried his best to distance himself away from the madness. 

 

Tony winced, leaned over none too subtly towards his band manager and whispered, ‘Wade Wilson? Really?’

 

‘He runs The Merc Without A Mouth, one of the most popular blogs ever to grace the internet, Tony,’ Natasha replied calmly.

 

‘Whatever, he’s still a loony,’ Tony said in turn. In front of them the young bespectacled man raised his hand. ‘You there, the kid with the glasses!’

 

‘Peter Parker, sir, how different would it be without Pepper and Happy?’ the Parker boy asked.

 

‘Everything, both Pepper and Happy were important elements in our band and our music, obviously without them we never could be the same. But with new additions to the Avengers, hopefully we will breathe new life into our music,’ Tony said, the crowd murmured and a million cameras flashed.

 

‘I’ve got a question!’ Wade cried from behind the Parker boy, the brunet frowned in annoyance, a customary reaction when in close proximity to Wade

.  
‘Loki Odinson, what do you think The Odinsons and The Warriors Three will be called now that there’s only one Odinson left?’ Wade asked to which the sea of people laughed. Loki glared at the lot of them and the laughter quickly dissipated.

 

‘What they choose to call themselves now is no longer of my concern,’ Loki replied.  
Wade oooh-ed as he jotted vigorously into his pad. ‘How does your brother feel about this?’ the blogger asked as he licked the tip of his pen, staining his tongue blue.

 

Loki leaned back into his seat, bored, ‘You have three questions, Wilson. Sure you want me to answer that one?’

 

Wade blinked, taken aback then smiled a shit-eating grin and wrote some more into his pad. Loki clenched his fist and was about to stand but was held down firmly by Bruce on his left and Steve on his right. Bruce was evidently stronger than he looked.

 

‘Next question!’ Natasha said hurriedly, and the press went at the bait like a pack of rabid dogs.

 

From the edge of Loki’s bed, Thor sat still in disbelief. Disbelief and hurt that his brother (or not-brother) could care so little for them. But then again, it seems to have bothered Loki when the Wilson fellow asked about how Thor would feel. Loki had refused to answer . Perhaps all was not lost.

\--

 

 

Despite the Avengers enthusiasm, their first band practice wasn’t exactly what Tony had expected – given he had expected them to hit all the beats in sync while he blasted the socks off everyone in the recording room with his stellar vocals.

 

Tony liked to think himself as a pretty hardcore, slave driving perfectionist when it came to his music but he would never hold a candle, or even a matchstick to Loki.

 

‘Stop,’ Loki said for must have been the tenth time and it wasn’t even half the morning. ‘Barton,’ Loki said sharply and Clint’s bass petered out like a movie extra slinking out of sight. ‘Are you all not listening to yourselves?’

 

‘I think we’re doing alright,’ Bruce replied with a frown. ‘I mean, your arrangement is, well, it’s not something we’re used to.’ 

 

Loki cast him a cool glance and turned to Steve, ‘Rogers, you are off half a beat on the second verse, Barton, the bass is too loud, it’s drowning out the synthesiser. Stark––’  
‘Uh. No,’ countered Tony. ‘Paying your wages.’

 

Loki shot him a thin, humourless grin and said, ‘Stark, you drag your notes too much.’ Tony was really starting to regret doing this whole band thing as Loki launched into a tirade about everything that was wrong with their playing. It seemed that he could pick out the smallest of flaws that would have escaped the notice of most professionals and the worst part was, the bastard was right.

 

‘What about you?’ Clint snapped, taking long strides forward and pushing into Loki’s space. ‘I don’t think you’re actually in time with the rest of us either.’

 

‘I’m not. But it’s only because this band can hardly follow the actual time-count.’

 

Clint open and closed his mouth several times before he managed to say, ‘You––’ And Loki just smirked, eyes blazing. The man was clearly looking for a fight, one way or another and had been thrumming with… something since the press conference.

 

From the keyboard, Bruce said warningly, ‘Clint….’

 

Tony ran a hand over his face and rolled up Loki’s lyrics. ‘I need a break. Where’s Pepper when you need her?’ When he left, the room fell quiet. Tony managed to hold himself straight until he made it to the roof. 

 

Then, he let himself sag against the wall. For the first time in a long time, he itched for a smoke. He couldn’t help but feel something had gone wrong somewhere. Not that Loki wasn’t a genius and Bruce, Clint and Steve weren’t awesome as individuals. But sometimes people just didn’t click and well... Tony had experienced enough of lost chemistry to understand that no matter how hard you pushed for something to stick, sometimes things just didn’t work out.

 

The door beside him opened and Steve poked his head out. ‘Hey.’

 

Tony smiled. ‘Hey yourself.’

 

Steve edged tentatively out and closed the door. ‘The guys went across the street for coffee.’

 

Tony blinked in surprise. ‘Like together?’

 

Steve shrugged. He was wearing a plait shirt with the sleeves rolled up. Tony studied the blisters on his palms which told him Steve had been practicing way before today just to make sure he didn’t mess up when he came in. ‘Are you okay?’ Steve asked.

 

‘Just needed to refocus,’ Tony said. ‘And reflect on my bad life choices.’

 

Steve made a face. ‘Tony, it’s the first practice. We are bound to make mistakes.’

 

‘Who am I kidding, Steve? The Avengers practically ended when Pepper and Happy left. I’m just trying to rebuild it from the leftover bits, like Frankenstein except it’s the Avengers so… Franken-vengers.’ Tony started pacing. ‘And Loki and Clint hate each other.’

 

‘I didn’t really like you when we first met,’ Steve said with a smile.

 

Tony whipped around, lifting a hand to his heart in mock hurt. ‘Really? You wound me, Steve. I’d like to remind you that I’m very likeable.’

 

‘My point is,’ Steve carried on. ‘Is that people need time to get to know each other.’

 

‘Yeah, somehow I seriously doubt Clint and Loki are going to be bosom buddies.’ Tony unrolled the lyrics he had stuffed into his pocket. Steve pressed near to read over Tony’s shoulder. They shared a moment of silence. 

 

‘If we could just work together enough to pull off Loki’s arrangement,’ Steve said quietly. ‘I think we would be… great.’

 

‘Yeah,’ Tony agreed, feeling more than grateful that Steve was here and Steve could always be counted on to hold everyone together.

 

When they got back Loki, Clint and Bruce were mulling together over a few sheets of music. Bruce looked up and handed them two cups of coffee. ‘We made some changes.’

 

‘We?’ Tony asked, taking a sip and feeling sparks fire all along his neurons.

 

‘And Nat will be here in half an hour. Apparently the meeting with Asgard will take longer than expected.’

 

Tony noticed Loki stiffening at the mention of his family’s recording company but other than that, he gave no outward sign he even heard them. 

 

‘So, are we going to start? Or is moping a new past time?’ Clint asked aloud. ‘Cause moping sucks.’ There was a shift in the air. Tony could feel it. Maybe it was the coffee. Maybe they were finally getting their shit together.

 

Loki picked up his violin, new scores held in one hand for all of them. ‘Shall we begin?’

 

\--

 

 

_It is in my heart_

_Perhaps it always was_

_You call me an idiot_

_And you think me so_

_But I’m not an idiot_

_I knew you were not the same_

_But I loved you too much_

_To see the truth._

Jane frowned as Thor finished his song; she looked up from the lyrics in her hands to the sad man by the piano. Thor was slumped in his seat, all his fire gone like smoke in a storm after Loki had legally broke off from The Odinsons and The Warriors Three and Asgard Recordings. Thor looked back hopefully at her; Jane cleared her throat and read the lyrics again.

 

‘So?’ Thor asked.  
‘It’s not bad… it just… doesn’t sound like Odinsons and The Warriors Three,’ Jane said as she place the paper down on the piano’s top.

 

‘We’re experimenting, trying something new. Isn’t that what artists do?’ he replied, but it sounded oddly hollow like words repeated too many times to too many people before this.

 

‘It’s about him isn’t it?’ Jane said, defeated.

 

‘What? Who?’ the blond inquired, confused like lost puppy.

 

‘It’s always him. Even when he’s gone, he’s still here,’ Jane moaned. She threw herself into the nearest piece of furniture which was a worn out armchair covered with mysterious stains.  
Thor thumbed his music sheets guiltily in response. Outside his window; the billboard across the street was being slapped with The Avengers’ Comeback promo picture. Jane looked out of the window and back to Thor.

 

‘I never told you why we had to break up, right?’ Jane asked.

 

Thor smiled forlornly and shook his head, ‘No’.

 

‘It was because, no matter how hard I tried or we tried, there always felt as if there was three people in our relationship…,’ Jane explain. Thor looked as if he was about to protest but then a realization dawned upon him and he simply looked shocked.

 

‘But he was my brother!’ the man replied, to which Jane raised her eyebrows to and Thor in turn looked wretched. ‘Gods damn it all! Did everyone realize it but me?!’

 

‘Well… as Darcy had put it, you two could not be any more similar than a black swan and a Peking duck,’ Jane said, smiling remorsefully back at her friend.

 

‘Wait,’ said Thor, his eyes narrowed after a beat, ‘Loki being the swan?’ 

 

Jane blinked back blandly, and Thor nodded despondently in understanding. They sat in silence for a moment, both watching a man on a lift smoothening out Tony Stark’s face onto the billboard.

 

‘I saw him going after that man,’ Thor said, he sounded more than a little self-defecating. ‘He almost made me think that they were… involved….’

 

Jane bit her lip, pained, ‘Err… I suppose this could be a bad time to tell you that he’s living with Tony Stark?’

 

‘WHAT?!’ Thor yelled, mortified.

 

\--

 

Loki was playing his violin, and had been for the last 4 hours. Tony groaned as adjusted the headphones on his ears, in front of him a tank exploded on his laptop screen. It wasn’t like Loki didn’t play well, he did, which was what attracted Tony to the man in the first place but at this moment the younger man’s practicing was bordering on obsessive. 

 

Suddenly there was silence, the playing had stopped. Tony frowned and pulled off his headphones just to be sure. There was absolute silence except for the pitter-patter of the rain against their window. Concerned, Tony turned around in his sofa.

 

The younger man had his back turned to him. His spine and shoulders was looking oddly rigged, and he had his fiddle clenched so tightly in his hand that Tony was worried that it might snap. Fenris, the oddly wolfish pet of his roommate whined at his master’s feet.

 

‘I’m ok, Fenris,’ Loki said, sounding uncharacteristically gentle to the dog, now Tony was really worried. Loki’s pocket buzzed into life, he pulled the phone out, rolled his eyes and hung up on the call.

 

‘Loki, what’s going on?’ Tony asked, as he watched Loki turn off his phone. Momentarily, he wondered if that was Asgard Recordings calling him, Loki had been not quite himself ever since he was “freed” by Asgard.

 

‘Nothing,’ he replied, drawing the dark russet curtains shut with more force than necessary. ‘I’m going to write some music,’ he said, signalling the end of the conversation as he walked out of the hall to the direction of his room. Tony shrugged as he slid his headphones on; it wasn’t as if he was really expecting a straight answer from Loki anyway.

 

Beyond the dark curtains, outside the window, Thor stood with his phone in hand as he was steadily getting drenched under the rain. He looked up from his phone, at the third story window where his brother had just metaphorically slapped him in the face.

 

‘He hung up on me… again!’ Thor cried in dismay, beside him Jane shifted as she tried to shelter him with her small umbrella. 

 

‘Maybe, you should have come alone?’ Jane suggested, the rain was getting heavier.  
Thor looked back at his friend frowning, Jane sighed, at was times like this where she was forced to concede with Loki that Thor was indeed a bit thick. Thor looked like he was either about to cry or the rain had caught him in his eyes.

 

‘I will sing him a song!’ Thor declared, a fire burning fiercely in his eyes.

 

Beside him, Jane looked on uncertainly. Ice-cream, that was what they needed, ice-cream and a lot of chocolate. Ice-cream and chocolate after a hot bath, Jane concluded and maybe after that Thor would be much more sensible.

 

\--

 

Jane pressed the buzzer and waited.

 

‘Hello?’ came the distorted mechanical voice.

 

‘Hi, Jane Foster. I’m here to see Loki?’

 

There was a long silence before the voice said, ‘He says he’s kinda not in. Look, on the scale of one to ten, how important this is?’

 

‘Eleven.’

 

Another long pause. ‘He doesn’t want to see you but as this is my apartment, I say come on up.’

 

‘Thanks,’ Jane said. Tony Stark sounded rather nice despite all the awful things she read about him in the media.

 

The man who answered the door was dressed in low slung jeans and a washed out AC/DC shirt. ‘Hi.’ Stark flashed her a grin before sipping something from a mug that reads ‘If you want it, come and get it!’

 

Jane peeked behind him and Stark stepped aside to let her in. The apartment was lavish but messy. She spotted Loki’s keyboard and his violin next to a set of drums but no sign of Loki himself.

 

‘He’s in his room,’ Stark said, pointing her to a door. Jane caught the sound of swing jazz before Tony put on his headphones and settled onto the couch with a magazine. 

 

‘Thanks,’ she said but hoping the oncoming conversation wouldn’t result in a shouting match that would have Tony turning up the volume. Loki’s door wasn’t locked so Jane let herself in.

 

‘I’m not here,’ Loki said, reclining on the bed and not looking up. A notepad rested on his drawn up knees, sheets of paper strewn about.

 

‘Hi to you to,’ Jane said, shutting the door. Loki’s room was neat. There were books and CDs stacked neatly on the shelves. His laptop was plugged in, more sheaves of paper and a collection of trinkets that told her Loki was making a home for himself here.

 

‘What do you want?’

 

Jane fidgeted. She always felt unsure of where she stood with Loki. Sometimes they got along so well, she almost could believe he liked her. Other times, he looked at her with such quiet loathing, it scared her. ‘Um, you look good. This.’ She gestured around. ‘Looks nice.’

 

‘Is there a purpose to this visit or did you merely come here to do a documentary on my room?’ Finally, Loki was looking at her but his face was a marble mask, unreadable.  
Well, damn the niceties. ‘I’m here because of Thor.’

 

‘And what has that great oaf done this time?’ Loki asked.

 

‘Nothing. He’s not doing anything.’ That earned her a raised eyebrow. ‘Loki,’ Jane sighed exasperated. ‘He’s holed himself up in his house. He won’t come out.’

 

Loki snorted. ‘That’s a first. And what do you expect me to do about it?’

 

‘I was hoping you could go talk to him.’

 

The grip Loki had on his pen was so tight, it was quivering. ‘Talk?’ he asked, voice cutting through the air with a hiss. ‘When has Thor ever been _one for talking_?’

 

The last words were hurled at Jane with such force she flinched. Loki took a deep breath and closed his eyes. His notepad had fallen to the side, where she could make out scribbles that marked the beginning of a song. ‘Leave,’ Loki said after a moment.

 

Jane was tempted to. ‘No,’ she said instead. ‘No. Thor needs help. You need to talk to him. Not just for him but for you too!’

 

‘Jane, please.’

 

She threw her hands up. ‘Both of you, seriously.’ She threw open the door but turned back to say, ‘You look well, Loki. But I think… things could be better if you just talked to Thor.’ She saw the way his eyes grew distant and searching and knew she had given him something to think about.

 

Tony was still on the couch, headphones on and resolutely looking at his magazine. He turned around when she walked past. ‘Oh, hey, do you –‘

 

‘I can walk myself down,’ Jane piped, already halfway out the door. ‘Thank you.’ On the ride down, she hoped she got through to Loki. She might have played up the seriousness of Thor’s condition a little too much.

 

\--

 

Thor woke up to the sound of shuffling and bolted upright blinking. A piece of paper had stuck itself to his cheek from where he had fallen asleep on his desk and he swatted it away.

 

‘Hello, Thor,’ Loki said. But it was far from a greeting. ‘You seem… perfectly alive.’ He picked up a piece of paper, eyes scanning the mess of crossed out words and smudged writing. 

 

Thor itched to snatch it back but such tactics would never work on Loki, who was deceptively quick with his movements. He waited for the biting remark. Instead Loki pushed the paper aside and said, ‘I expected to find you half dead from an overdose the way Jane was going on.’

 

 _I’m not you, Loki._ Thor did not say the words though, did not bite the bait the Loki let cast. Besides, those actions were in the past. A silence settled between them, Loki raising his eyebrows then shrugging. 

 

‘How did you get in?’ Thor asked curiously.

 

‘I still have the key,’ Loki replied, sounding bored as his eyes shifted to look around although he barely turned. Loki’s room was exactly the same as he had left it, albeit missing a few possessions. Thor had not touched anything else even if he occasionally lay in Loki’s bed trying to figure him out. He was glad Loki did not ask him what he was doing in here.

 

‘Well, since you are fine, I’m going,’ Loki muttered.

 

Thor scrambled up and made a clumsy grab for Loki’s arm. His grip was needlessly tight around the smooth wool covered arm, as if afraid Loki would disappear into thin air. His brother gave Thor’s hand a long look and sighed. ‘If you are about to beg, don’t,’ Loki said sharply. ‘I’m not coming back.’

 

‘At least give me an explanation. As your brother, I dese—’

 

‘You are not my brother!’ Loki roared, wrenching himself away. There was a long stunned silence filled only with Loki’s panting.

 

‘Why would you say that?’ Thor asked weakly, recalling the first time Loki said something almost similar. It hadn’t been that long ago but he had almost forgotten the uncomfortable feelings the words aroused in him.

 

Loki looked like he was about to bolt so Thor seized him by the shoulders and shook him. ‘Why would you say that, Loki?’ He was shoved back with such force, he stumbled.

 

Loki drew himself upright, imperious and leering. ‘I see that _father_ ,’ he said the word like a curse. ‘Chose to leave you an ignorant buffoon. It matters little to me that I was adopted or that I was always lesser in his eyes. It changes nothing except –’ He stopped suddenly, the fury dying from his eyes to form a thin line of his mouth. Thor held his gaze, feeling as if all the air had been sucked from his lungs, his mind still whirling. Loki was not his brother.

 

‘When did you find out?’ he asked dully.

 

‘Early last year, over a most unpleasant dinner.’

 

Thor didn’t remember any dinner of that sort. Obviously, he had not been present. But he remembered after; the sudden spiral into drugs and alcohol and wilder and wilder antics and the equally sudden sobering up. He remembered his surprise on the day Loki appeared in the studio sharp eyed and clear headed for once. Thor had not expected it to last but it did.

 

The man standing in front of him was proof of that. ‘Strange what learning that you’re adopted can do for the psyche,’ Loki said as if reading his mind. ‘After the initial existential crisis, I actually felt rather liberated. All my failures and successes were mine alone.’

 

Thor shook his head. ‘It doesn’t matter,’ he found himself saying. ‘You’re right, Loki. This changes nothing. You will always be –’

 

Loki raised a swift and sudden hand in the space between them, silencing Thor efficiently. ‘Do not speak as if you know what it is like..,’ he said, his voice quiet and carefully  
controlled. There were small quivers in his voice but and face and body betrayed nothing. 

 

Thor swallowed, in the dull morning light, Loki looked especially pale, tired and fragile like a beautiful glass sculpture.

 

‘Do you know what I felt when father told me I wasn’t his son? And that I wasn’t your brother?’ he asked, his pale long fingers hovering inches away from his chest. ‘I felt relief. Utter unashamed relief.’ 

 

He looked at Thor for a moment, a fierce and defiant fire burnt in his green eyes. It was that fire that burnt something hot in his chest, something which he never allowed more than a passing thought. Not more than a passing thought… and when Loki sighed and shook his head the spell was broken.

 

He moved and made for the door pausing, ‘I- I am who I am Thor… And maybe one day you will see that,’ he said, there was something in his tone that Thor couldn’t quiet pin down. And then he was gone, only his shadow moving away from the door. 

 

Thor blinked, he was overwhelmed by the emotions of his own and by the many more that were not his, but he also realize that Loki came with his own key and left with that key. That alone gave Thor renewed hope as he sat down and pulled out a new sheet of paper. _How Do I Know Your Heart?_

 

\--

 

 _Though touching [no its not], Odinson [its legally still Odinsons] and the Warriors Three’s new single “An Idiot Like Me” [The Fool] was as exciting a bunch of chimichangas without chimichangas [that doesn’t make sense…]. “Dark Heart” is downright depressing. “How do I know your heart?”??! Err… you cut it open? I mean the lyrics don’t even make sense, “I want to see in your darkness”? REALLY?! Cause you CAN’T see in darkness! [Err… its metaphorical?]_

_Whatever! Bottom-line is it was boring, boring, BORING!!!!!!!_

_It also sounds strangely incestuous! [We’re not supposed to say that!]._

_What?! It’s true! It can’t be that chick; she already left him long time. [You mean Jane Foster?]  
It can only be the one and only LOKI ODINSON! I can’t say I’m surprised, but I am surprised that it took them this long! [STOP! We’re going to get sued!]_

_I mean he practically confessed, “Creative differences” my ass! [he didn’t answer us, it could have been anything!]_

_Obviously Loki Odinson has had the hots for that Viking god since I don’t know when! [Do you read the shit you type?] No, cause if I did I would be boring and no one would read the blog anymore!_

_On the upside, Loki’s new band, the Avengers are looking up! [But we haven’t heard anything from them yet!] Doesn’t matter, everyone who has half a brain [Ehm.. more than half a brain?] knows that Loki’s the core lyricist and he rocks._

_Avengers, I’m your biggest fan! Yours truly! Muah! :*_

\--

 

‘That’s disgusting… not to mention psychedelic,’ the young Parker kid said as he finish reading the page the Avengers was showing him on Tony’s laptop. Peter looked disturbed and a bit annoyed in the upright just way Steve would get annoyed. It was a cute look… Only because it was so Steve looking, Tony reminded himself. 

 

‘That’s why we need you to set Loki’s story straight,’ Steve added, frowning at the screen before him.

 

‘Wait… You want me to wage a cyber-blogging war on the most irritating, insane, immoral blogger that there is in this time and day?’ Peter asked, his young brown eyes narrowing at Tony.

 

‘Yes,’ the older man replied.

 

‘And I’m getting paid?’ the kid asked again, disbelief slowly creeping into his voice.

 

‘Yes, we would insist on it,’ Steve replied seriously.

 

‘WOW! Of course I’d do it!’ the kid cried excitedly, no longer able to keep it all in. He cracked his knuckles and smile, ‘When do I start?’

 

Steve and Tony both exchanged looks; they glanced over at their increasingly broody lyricist. Loki was sitting at the studio’s work desk, hunched over the same arrangement since two nights ago. He scarcely moved and when he did it was for the very barest of necessities, eating was worryingly not what Loki considered as a necessity. 

 

‘ASAP,’ Tony said, the excited reporter cracked his knuckles and reached out to the keyboard with an impish glint in his eye. Tony felt his faith growing in the kid already.

 

‘Do you really think this will help?’ Steve asked in a hushed voice as they left Peter to his own devices.

 

‘I don’t know, but we’ve got to do something. Obviously, something’s eating him up inside, maybe it’s this Merc guy, maybe it’s not. Either way, Wade Wilson has to be stopped before he hurts either of our bands anymore,’ Tony explained. 

 

At the corner of the studio, Loki rose, both men held their breath but the man merely reached over for a fresh sheet of paper and sat down again. Steve sighed.

 

‘Maybe it’s the song?’ Steve suggested, Tony cast him a horrified look.

 

‘Steve, I know what you’re thinking but don’t go down the rabbit hole. The Odinson brothers have always been weird and always will be, just leave it at that,’ Tony said warningly. There was such a thing as too possessive sibling love, Tony had seen it on one unfortunate music awards after-party. It was long ago but it was one of the few times he wished he had been less sober.

 

‘But surely you know they can’t be related? Not blood wise,’ Steve reasoned, this man was amazingly un-judgmental, so pure and kind. Tony didn’t deserve him. 

 

‘I’ve done it,’ Loki announced, triumphant from his work place. Both Steve and Tony turned to look their companion brandishing several papers in one hand with a slightly manic look in his green eyes. 

 

‘It took some compromising on my own style and principles but I finally did it! Gentlemen, I do believe that I’ve written what will be a hit song!’ Loki explained as he leaped over the desk and handed his bandmate the composition.

 

Tony read it and passed it to Steve who read and reread it, they both looked up at their lyricist whose smile had the kind of edge that sleepless nights and borderline obsession would induce.

 

Tony when first, ‘It’s good. Better than good, it’s great! But it doesn’t really sound like you…’  
Loki’s smile fell, and a frown was forming in between his well arched brows

.  
‘Loki, is it worth it giving yourself up to be “popular”?’ Steve asked, he sounded like a concerned school teacher and Loki was his wayward charge. 

 

‘That’s the whole point, is it not?’ Loki spat, snatching back his arrangement. He was downright glaring now, in the background Tony notice the Parker boy looking over disapprovingly. ‘Let’s face it. Our music and style isn’t exactly what the masses listen to.’

 

‘But what we do is art,’ Steve replied, eyeing Loki wearily as the slimmer man paced about the studio, body language radiating frustration.

 

‘Art? Yes, tell that to the 99.9% of morons who voted Thor’s stupid song for the music awards,’ their pale companion practically shouted.

 

‘Really, Loki? Have you heard his music lately?’ the blond asked and he wasn’t even angry, merely curious. Tony was amazed, because he was getting angrier and angrier at Loki on Steve’s behalf. 

 

‘Do not patronize me, Captain Righteous,’ Loki snapped, ‘And no, I try not to listen to anyone else’s song while I’m working on my own. It fucks with my originality… Why? Any good?’

 

‘Not particularly…’ Steve replied, rubbing the base of his neck uncertainly. 

 

‘Then why should I give a fuck?!’ Loki shot back, in a mixture of a desperate laugh and a scream. He was close to doing a re-enactment of the Exorcist at this point, swaying where he stood.

 

‘Ok… Loki, you’re not yourself…,’ Tony said carefully with one hand raised in front of him as if he were approaching a cornered wild animal. 

 

‘Oh, you too, Stark? Are you that desperate to get into Rogers pants that you just simply agree with everything he says?’ the pale man said spitefully, his voice now a ragged whisper. Tony felt like he had just been slapped across the face and Steve looked just as shocked.

 

‘Did you just take a swig of bullshit? Or did you wake up on the wrong side of crazy?’ Tony asked incredulously but Loki, the idiot, had chosen that precise moment to collapse. He would have landed face first on the floor and probably break his pretty nose if Steve hadn’t caught him by the arms.

 

They both stared at their lyricist in Steve’s arms. His dark haired head hanging low and his body limp, legs sprawled and stretched in an awkward half kneel. 

 

‘Well, that’s a relief,’ Peter said from where he was sitting by the laptop. ‘I was beginning to wonder if I should call security,’ he added, to which both men frowned.

 

Together, they carefully rolled Loki onto his back. There was an odd silence as they worked.

 

‘So…,’ Steve started.

 

‘So, do we leave the bastard on the floor?’ Tony announced loudly. Steve looked confused. ‘I mean, after all that, he deserves the cold hard floor.’

 

Steve blinked slowly before muttering to himself, ‘Well, this must be how being Thor feels like.’

 

\--

 

Tony was out shopping with Bruce. Actually shopping, in an actual store because Bruce liked to engage in what he called ‘normal’ activities every now and then. The Avengers had just finished their recording and the first album would be launched next month. To celebrate, Natasha said she would throw a party and the first thing she did was hijacked Tony’s house and sent all of them on errand runs.

 

‘I don’t understand why we can’t go to a club like every normal band,’ Tony grumbled, pushing his sunglasses higher when he spied a girl two aisle down whipping out her handphone.

 

‘You do know wearing dark glasses indoors does not make you less conspicuous,’ Bruce said. ‘Besides, it’s been awhile since we actually hung out together.’

 

‘Aww, Brucey, are you missing our alone time?’ Tony cooed.

 

Bruce looked up from the box of pop tarts he was studying and gave Tony a very unimpressed smile. ‘Sure, Tony.’ Then went back to reading the calorie contents. ‘Maybe we should buy some healthier snacks. This alone has more than….’ Tony tuned out. He left Bruce to speculate the health merits of poptarts against cashew nuts and headed for the frozen foods section. Maybe Steve would like some ice-cream. He wondered what kind of flavour Steve liked and realised he didn’t really know.

 

Then he spied was a familiar hulking figure near the ice-cream section. The long blonde hair was hidden in a cap and the usual biker jacket had been replaced with a grey hoodie. Tony sidled near and picked up a tub of Hagen-Das, pistachio flavoured and said, ‘Fancy meeting you here, Odinson.’

 

Thor turned slowly, eyes narrowing. ‘Stark.’

 

‘The paparazzi would have a field day, if they found us. Congratulations on winning best new single, by the way. Dark Heart is actually ... kinda nice.’

 

‘Do you mock me, Stark?’ Thor asked, his voice low and spelling danger. Tony had a nagging feeling that Thor might just punch him. He picked up the largest ice cream tub in vicinity, just in case he needed it as a shield against those massive fists.

 

‘No mocking, nope. I don’t---it doesn’t sound like it,’ Tony said. ‘But it’s uh sincere, truly. It’s a great song.’ 

 

Thor eyed him for a long moment. When he sighed, the movements of his shoulders reminded Tony of mountains rising and falling. And the way Thor stared at the tub of strawberry mocha mix in his hands was so forlorn, Tony felt really sorry for him.

 

‘How is he?’ Thor asked.

 

‘Better now that we’ve finished the album. He was kinda…,’ Dickish? Crazy? Maniacal ? What would Steve say? ‘Difficult,’ Tony finished. ‘At the beginning. Then we got used to him.’

 

‘Is he… happy?’

 

‘If he isn’t, we both know why,’ Tony said, keeping his tone coolly polite. It was not possible for a human’s face to look even more dejected than Thor’s did at that moment.

 

‘Surely he must know… I wrote a song for him,’ Thor said more to himself than to Tony, blue eyes looking distant and troubled.

 

‘Forget about songs, big guy. Just go for it. Carpe diem and all that jazz,’ Tony said, voice rising. Steve would be so proud. Here was Tony, giving counselling on the fly to the enemy in a supermarket.

 

Thor frowned. ‘Carpe what?’

 

‘Nevermind.’

 

A round of applause broke out from the onlookers that had gathered. Tony looked around in surprise to see that they were surrounded by a ring of shoppers who had kindly given them at least 5 feet of privacy but were also busy taking pictures and recording them for the past several minutes.

 

Bruce appeared with a dark look between the crowd of grinning faces. ‘Christ,’ he said, pushing through and grabbing Tony’s arm. ‘You’re almost as bad as Clint. Hello, Thor. Can we please leave before you attract the whole store?’

 

But before he could drag Tony away someone shouted, ‘Mr. Stark! My daughter is a big fan of yours. If you don’t mind maybe you could sign… uh… sign this radish for me?’ Then there was a flurry of people asking for autographs from Thor, Tony and Bruce.

 

Tony and Bruce managed to escape when a new wave of fans appeared and left Thor who was clearly too nice or too big to actually disappear in a crowd, to fend for himself. 

 

Bruce was counting to ten under his breath as he wheeled their trolley to the cashier. ‘At least we managed to get everything,’ he said running through their shopping list. ‘Right, Tony?’ He looked around, seeing no sight of the man. ‘Tony?’

 

Tony stood in a corner of the tissues and toilet paper aisle. There was no one about. He took a deep breath. A guy should practice what he preached, right? He dialled a number. ‘Hey… Steve. It’s me… what would you say to dinner tomorrow?’

 

\--

 

Loki watched quietly as Tony greeted Steve at the door. ‘Steve, I said I would pick you up,’ Tony said, stepping aside as Steve looked around curiously.

 

‘I know but I wanted to see where you lived.’ Steve grinned as he studied the clothes on the couch. Loki was fastidiously tidy so it was obvious they were Tony’s. ‘More like how you live,’ he added. ‘Hi, Loki.’

 

‘Rogers,’ Loki said. Then met Tony’s glare head on and politely added, ‘Hello.’  
‘So, um, you ready?’ Steve asked. ‘You look good.’ He was sporting a very attractive shade of red high in his cheeks.

 

‘Yeah,’ Tony replied, a little breathlessly. ‘So do you.’ Loki had to endure two hours of moaning and whining and frantic clothes changing before Tony decided that he was running late and would Loki please stop writing the blasted song and help. He tried not to roll his eyes as Tony and Steve gazed at each other, Steve’s blue eyes burning bright like Tony  
He wondered if Tony could see it. From the way the man was bouncing on the balls of his feet, Loki could tell he was hopelessly nervous. 

 

Steve turned to Loki and asked suddenly, ‘Will you be alright?’

 

‘He’ll be fine,’ Tony said, glancing at Loki. 

 

‘Unlike Stark, I don’t need to be supervised at all times,’ Loki said.

 

Tony scowled. ‘I wasn’t the one who fainted.’ But he seemed to be less on edge so Loki didn’t rise to the bait, just raised a dismissive eyebrow. ‘Right…’ Tony faltered. ‘See you.’ And ushered Steve out, closing the door behind them.

 

The apartment fell into silence. He lied and told himself it was blissful rather than lonely. Fenris padded up to him and Loki was absurdly grateful for the company. He turned back to the song he was writing and played a few chords on the keyboard.

 

_In the silence, echoes in the shadows hollows_  
 _In the darkness, catching shadows in my palms_  
 _I’m made of cold, hard stone iron, craft in an artificial calm_  
 _Take(?) my heart out, lock it in(?)up(?) throwitaway away the key_

Tony usually had some input but Tony wasn’t here tonight. Tony was out with Steve, busy falling in love. Somehow that made Loki feel ten times worst which in turn made him feel guilty. He should be happy for Tony even though he could not find it himself to like Steve because Steve reminded him too much of Thor. They had the same blue eyes, the same easy kindness.

 

‘It seems I still have a heart,’ Loki murmured to himself and patted Fenris. He sighed and decided he needed a drink. Thankfully, Tony always kept his alcohol supply well stock. 

 

_I’ve got fast cars, them suits_  
 _Got lovers by the hundredsmillionsdozen, but_

But what? Tony Stark, millionaire extraordinaire, kind to strangers playing violins in subway stations but so achingly lonely, as if all that bluster and fast talk was to hide the emptiness within. Loki always wondered why he felt such a connection to Tony. They were so similar, both waiting for blue eyed men to shine some much needed light in their darkness. At least Tony had found his.

 

Loki was tired of waiting.

 

\--

 

The frost was forming outside Thor’s window, it was the cold of winter now … and he had been waiting for a response from Loki since fall. The shops across his apartment building were putting up their yearly Christmas lights and the billboard outside his window had a new Christmas sale poster slapped on. There was not yet snow, but it looked like there soon would be. Idly he turned on the radio and listened.

_In the silence, echoes in the hollows_  
 _In the darkness, catching shadows in my palm_  
 _I'm made of, cold, hard steel, craft in an artificial calm_  
 _Cut my heart out, lock it up and throw away the key_

_I’ve got fast cars, them sharp suits_  
 _Got girlfriends by the dozen, but_  
 _It don’t mean I love them_  
 _Cause I wear my armour like an ironman_

_You stranger with blue eyes_  
 _It open up, pulled me in and melt me down_  
 _You broke me_  
 _You broke my ironman_

_I don’t wanna be no ironman_  
 _I don’t wanna be cold and alone no more_  
 _I just wanna feel your blue eyes_  
 _When you melt me down_  
 _Steal my heart and put it back_

_I don’t wanna be no ironman_  
 _I don’t wanna be no ironman_  
 _I don’t wanna be no ironman_

_You stranger with blue eyes_  
 _It open up, pulled me in and melt me down_  
 _You broke me_  
 _You broke my ironman_

_Will you love me blue eyes?_  
 _When I’m no longer the better man…_

 

Natasha, Loki, Tony, Steve, Clint and Bruce set in silence as they listened to their song on the radio for the first time. There, cramped into a corner booth in a nearby coffee shop Tony smiled and Steve laughed, soon the whole table were laughing.

 

‘Oh, my god! It finally happened!’ Bruce exclaimed, beaming behind his fog clouded glasses from the hot mug of coffee in his hands.

‘I thought we would rip each other apart before anything got done,’ Tony laughed nervously. 

 

‘Yes, and who have we got to thank for this?’ Loki asked expectantly as he sipped his tea.

 

‘Steve,’ everyone else chorus, Loki choked and sputtered. 

 

‘But---’ The pale man protested, irritated. 

 

‘If it weren’t for Steve I would have killed you already, Odinson,’ Clint replied grimly, Steve blushed.

 

Natasha cleared her throat and turned her sharp calculating gaze on the lyricist, ‘Loki, about the song…, is it your story?’

 

Loki considered this for a moment as he stirred his tea, ‘Yes… and no.’ 

 

Beside him Tony developed a sudden interest in the faux marble pattern that covered the table and Steve face flushed a very attractive scarlet. 

 

‘No!’ Clint said as he looked from Steve to Tony and back to Steve again. ‘When?! And why didn’t we know?!’

 

Steve smiled sheepishly, ‘Tony didn’t want things to be weird… you know… if we didn’t quite fit…’ 

 

‘Besides, we started dating after the whole Loki meltdown fiasco and everyone was pretty much on edge,’ Tony explained with an offended ‘Hey!’ from the cause of said “fiasco”.

 

‘The “fiasco” was not my fault,’ Loki said, sounding a bit like a petulant child.

 

‘Of course, it wasn’t. It was Thor’s fault,’ Natasha said in mock understanding.

 

‘Yeah, that Thor really did quite a number on you,’ Bruce added, somehow managing to make the mockery sound earnest.

 

‘I hate all of you!’ Loki growled and proceeded to purposely ignore all of his bandmates for the duration of the conversation. His bandmates in turn ignored him, that was how it went with them, them annoying Loki, Loki annoying them and them both ignoring each other.

 

They begin to disperse when Natasha said that she had to see Peter, apparently the kid had been handling Wade Wilson all wrong, whatever she meant by that. After which the group left one by one. Bruce saying he had to go Christmas shopping, Steve and Tony said that they wanted to go skating together which left Clint alone with Loki.

 

‘So..,’ Clint dragged the syllable out.

 

‘So?’ Loki said, tartly. 

 

‘So, you and Thor…’ Clint began.

 

‘What about me and Thor?’ the younger man asked over his tea.

 

‘Why don’t you just confront him, you know? Mano-a-mano?’ the brunet suggested, and he even sounded sincere about it which surprised Loki. 

 

Loki blink thoughtfully but didn’t answer, he nodded slightly and turned to look out of the window. He wondered, a face to face confrontation… It usually ended with them fist fighting, mano-a-mano indeed. 

 

\--

 

 

After seemingly bored with Loki’s unresponsive company, Clint left and Loki followed suit. He scooped up his book (“12 Steps to a Happier Me” but it was not like he would let anyone catch him reading it) and left. 

 

The walk home was nice, almost nostalgic with all the snow about. He drew out his note book and quickly scribbled down the first few verses that came into his head. Dodging running children looking for an accident on the slippery pavement and screaming mothers, he arrived at the apartment’s corridor on the third floor.

 

There was a figure, sitting on the floor, leaning against Tony’s door. The slouch of the shoulders and long blond hair was unmistakable. It was Thor. He swallowed; too late to run away now, the man had already seen him and was rising to his feet. 

 

‘Loki!’ Thor said. He looked better than when Loki had last seen him, less frustrated. He looked really good in fact; his winter black coat unzipped to reveal the red shirt Loki had given him so long ago. It was funny, how something so simple as a shirt could scrap at the frail shell of Loki’s emotions. He seized it and wrung it dead as quickly as possible, as he used to do and as he had always done.

 

‘Thor,’ the younger man said, he tried to be casual as he approached the apartment door. ‘What are you doing here?’

 

‘I came to see you,’ he replied, as simple and straight forward as always.

 

‘I---’ Loki stuttered and his steps faltered, he didn’t know how to handle this. Forwardness was not his forte. So he fell back on the only way he knew how.

 

‘I didn’t write the song for you,’ he said. He knew he was sounding nonsensical, even childish. He expected his brother to snap at him, get upset or maybe confused but Thor showed none of that. He merely smiled and shook his head.

 

‘I’m not here because of a song,’ the older man said. Thor stepped toward Loki carefully and his hands hovered over the slighter man’s body uncertainly, the light from the window at the end of the corridor casting a kind of halo behind Thor. It was unsettling. 

 

‘Stop that,’ Loki said, he was clutching his books so hard at the side of his hip that he felt his nails leaving deep indentations in its hardcover.

 

‘Stop what?’ the older man asked, confused. 

 

‘Fidgeting!’ he said, he wonder briefly if it was strangely cowardly to rush pass Thor for the door now. 

 

Thor slipped his hands into his pockets and took several steps towards Loki, the heat was radiating off his body, his breath smelled like coffee and mint. The heat of him… Thor had always been unusually warm or maybe it was that Loki was always unusually cold.

 

‘Look me in the eye, Loki,’ he said, it could have been demand but it was whispered so softly and gently that it sounded like something else entirely, something that they both had been fighting to avoid ever since… ever. ‘Come on, I’ve stopped “fidgeting” like you asked me to. It’s only fair if you listen to me too.’

 

Loki scoffed. ‘And since when am I known to listen to you?’ he asked, looking purposefully at the window behind Thor. Thor huffed in frustration, and then Loki found the taller man pressing his face right into Loki’s. Temple to temple, nose brushing nose, forcing him to stared into the glare of piercing blue eyes. Loki swallowed. 

 

‘Now I ask you this,’ Thor said, the god damn man still had his hands in his pockets, pining Loki down with nothing more than his gaze. ‘Only because I need to hear it from you… Are we brothers?’

 

Loki bit his lower lip hard enough to draw blood, it was much easier taking in circles or outright lying, it was safer. ‘No,’ he said.

 

Thor squeezed his eyes shut, warm hands came to hold the younger man’s slender neck and face in a grip that was bordering on painful. ‘Christ, Loki… All this time.’

 

‘I’m… sorry?’ Loki whispered because being face with telling Thor, made it all the more real and he just didn’t know what else to say. It was when Thor’s thumb swiped away at the wetness on his cheeks, did Loki realize he was crying. 

 

‘Loki…,’ the older man said his name in a kind of wonderment, Loki suddenly felt very very exposed and venerable, like every piece of truth of him had been laid bare and it was just too much. He moved to step away from Thor’s embraced but the latter merely wrapped his arms around him tighter. ‘Don’t,’ he said, burying his face into the crook of Loki’s shoulder. 

 

‘Thor, you need to let me go,’ he said, it was not a plea but it was close. A million questions rushed through his head and thousands of reasons why this was a bad idea came storming into his mind in a riot of alarm bells and whistles. 

 

‘Stop thinking, just stop,’ Thor replied, his lips brushing against Loki’s neck and ear. ‘Just hold me… and let me hold you,’ he said with a press of lips under the younger man’s scarf.  
Defeated and shocked, Loki slowly brought his arms up around Thor. 

 

‘You’re an idiot… and this is idiotic, and I’m idiotic,’ he said, his voice hitching and his eyes sliding shut as he felt Thor’s lips suck against his pulse.

 

‘Will you let me in?’ Thor asked, he had crowded the slighter man against the door.

 

‘Which in?’ Loki asked innocently from under his lashes, when Thor growled in frustration and pressed his lips on to Loki’s, tongue insistent and teeth nipping. Loki parted his lips for him, tangling pale fingers into sun gold hair. The slid of tongue stroking his, teeth clashing at times. It had an edge the kiss, a little desperate, a little volatile and very much filled with too many words that had been left unsaid. Those emotions and words slipped from the tip of Loki’s tongue into Thor’s mouth and Thor chased after it with a kind of force and intensity that reminded Loki of a thunder storm.

 

When they parted, Thor looked wrecked, his blue eyes was dark with desire and his lips red. Loki was sure that he didn’t look any better. Loki smiled, as he stroked through the older man’s hair. ‘I would love to let you in…,’ he said breathlessly.

 

‘But?’ Thor asked, his smile was bright and happy even though the hardness pressing ageist Loki’s hip must be killing Thor. Teasingly, Loki pressed up against him, Thor hissed and cursed, placing a strong hand on Loki’s hip.

 

‘But I want to be courted. I want to be wined, dined and showered in affection,’ Loki stated. He was serious and Thor did something very un-Thor-like, he nodded in understanding.

 

‘You want to do it proper,’ he said, cupping the side of Loki’s face tenderly. ‘I’ll wine and dine you and then I’ll make a proper woman out of you,’ he said teasingly as he kissed the younger man.

 

Loki felt that he should be offended by it but at this moment, he didn’t care, he could always make Thor work harder later. Right now it was Thor’s lips on his, his cold body trapped against Thor’s warmth and he didn’t have a care in the world who saw them because he was, for the first time in a long time, happy. Outside the corridor’s window, the first winter’s snows begin to fall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter is the epilogue and is rated EXPLICIT because it's nothing but a shameless excuse for pR0n. :D


	2. Epilogue

It was an early Sunday morning, so early in fact that when Thor was roused by Loki’s clumsy but insisted poking finger. It was still grey and dark outside. He didn’t need to be told the reason why the younger man had irritated him out of his sleep. Honestly sometimes it was as if they were still brothers. Thor’s phone was blaring the annoying Mr Bean cartoon theme song that Loki had programed into the device earlier in the week.

 

He was tempted to vindictively let the phone ring and annoy the younger man in turn but thought the better of it when he saw the caller id, “Father”. Thor braced himself as he reached for the phone. Behind him Loki roused when he felt his lover tense up so suddenly.

 

‘What in gods name do you think you are doing?!’ was the first thing that was bellowed through the receiver. Thor winced. Behind him Loki sat up and made a grab for the phone, Thor effectively held it away from the younger man whose limbs were still clumsy and clouded in sleep.

 

‘Give it to me!’ Loki hissed and as he fought against the firm hand that held him at bay, the sheets slipped distractingly down his pale skin and slender hips.

 

‘No,’ Thor said quietly back. Loki huffed in annoyance as he pushed his dark hair from his face. 

 

‘Is he there?!’ Odin yelled angrily, ‘Good! Put me on speaker!’

 

Thor glared at the phone in his hand, his thumb hovering over the red hang-up button. ‘Don’t,’ Loki said, ‘Let him at us, let’s see what that old bat has to say.’

 

The older man sighed. ‘Loki, behave,’ he reminded the younger man who smirked and made a zipping motion against his lips. Cautiously, Thor set his father on speaker.

 

‘I cannot put into words just how disappointed I am!’ Odin bellowed, Loki slid himself flush against Thor’s back and rested his chin over the older man’s as they both glared at the phone. ‘Have you no shame?! Loki, it is unsurprising, even expected but you Thor?! How is it that you manage to let yourself be dragged down into the coils of this serpent?!’

 

Loki let out something between a huff and a laugh as he wrapped his arms around Thor’s waist. Thor frowned at the phone, ‘I do not believe, Father, that Loki is a legless reptile.' Behind him, Loki pressed his lips against the base of his neck to try to muffle his laughter, but Thor felt his body shaking with it against him. He smiled.

 

‘That boy is poison! He is immature, spiteful and a silver tongued liar!’ Odin said, Loki punctuated the last comment by running his said “silver tongue” against the shell of Thor’s ear. ‘He has no conscious, no values and certainly no morals!’ the receiver shouted. Loki responded by giving the phone the finger with on hand and sliding down to stroke Thor with the other. Thor gasped and quickly grabbed the slimmer hand to stop him. He shot Loki a look which said both “Are you out of your mind?!” and “I want to fuck you so bad.” Loki sniggered. 

 

‘Loki, I am speaking to you too! How can you do this to Thor! He is your brother!’ Odin screamed, somewhere in the background they hear shuffling noises.

 

‘Since we’re not brothers Mr Odinson and I’m not your son, I don’t see how this is relevant,’ Loki replied as he attempted with both hands now slipping down Thor’s body. The blond caught both his hands in a gentle but firm hold. Loki pouted and bit Thor in the shoulder, the older man yelped in surprised and Odin had fallen very silent. 

 

‘If it helps,’ Loki added cheekily, ignoring the warning glare from his lover, ‘I loved Thor even before I knew. Loved him then and I love him now.’

 

There was another long pause and the line when dead. ‘Do you think I’ve killed him?’ Loki asked with too much cheer in his voice to be strictly normal. Thor laughed as he turned off his phone.

 

‘I don’t think so,’ Thor said as he allowed Loki to push him down onto his back as the slander man straddled his hips. ‘Is it true?’

 

‘What’s true?’ he asked as he pressed down against Thor’s cock with his own answering hardness. The weak light in the bedroom making the younger man’s pale body appear to glow in an otherworldly way. 

 

‘That you loved me even before,’ Thor replied, he coated his fingers with lube and reached behind Loki, they slid in easily. Last night’s activity leaving Loki still slightly loose.

 

Last night’s activity leaving Loki still slightly loose. Loki moaned as he pressed down on Thor’s fingers. ‘If I hadn’t, I’d probably be a lot less angry at you,’ he said, gasping as Thor crooked his fingers against the bunch of nerves inside the younger man. 

 

‘Nuff,’ Loki said as he pulled off from Thor’s fingers, reaching behind to line Thor’s cock up with his wet slick entrance. 

 

‘Loki,’ Thor moaned as he watched Loki lower his pale beautiful body onto his prick, slowly, inch by inch. Thor was enveloped in the hot slick tightness of Loki’s body. ‘God you’re beautiful,’ he said in breathless amazement. The younger man laughed as he raised himself ever so slightly, his elegant fingers spread over Thor’s broad chest for leverage and he pushed down again, setting a pace that was almost painfully slow. 

 

The older man groaned, falling back against the headboard as Loki rode him in deep slow movements that was almost but not quite enough. Thor reached out and gripped Loki’s hips, the skin smooth beneath his hands, fucking up harder into the warm body above him. A soft moan escaped the younger man’s lips. 

 

‘Impatient are we?’ Loki chided, but his voice was breathless and hitching with every upwards trust as Thor pressed their lower bodies together. Instead of replying, Thor pushed up and pulled Loki down by his neck, pressing their lips together. Loki gasped as their angle shifted, allowing Thor’s tongue to slip into his mouth. 

 

The slighter man reach up with one hand and gripped Thor’s hair just shy of rough as he took control of the kiss, nipping and sucking at Thor’s bottom lip. He pushed his tongue into the older man’s mouth in an urgency that was matched with the speeding up of his hips. 

 

‘Fuck!’ Thor cursed as the parted from Loki’s lips, he had lost and the younger man had complete control of speed and deepness. Loki’s usually pale skin was flushed, his lips parted as he started to lose his rhythm. The room was filled with the music of their love making, their gasps, moans and the sound of skin on skin. 

 

Thor wrapped his hand around Loki’s cock and stroked him as he fucked into the slighter man. Loki let out what could have been a curse but was choked off into a cry of pure bliss as his released splattered between their bodies. He lost his hold as his arms folded under him; Thor slid a strong arm around his narrow waist and held him close.

 

It didn’t give him much freedom of movement, but that was almost secondary to the press of Loki’s lips against his jaw, those pale arms wrapped around his neck the closeness of their bodies and intimacy of the moment. He felt his balls tighten; he fucked into Loki several more times before he was blinded by sheer mind blowing ecstasy. Thor fell back into the pillows. They lay that way, neither moving until Thor felt his prick soften and slip out of Loki’s hole and the still warm wetness that followed, trickling down onto his thigh. Loki pushed himself up and kissed the older man. It was slow and even a little messy. When he pulled back he was smiling in a way that had none of the edge that Loki usually had. 

 

‘I love you, Thor Odinson,’ he said as he planted another chaste kiss upon Thor’s lips. 

 

‘As I do you,’ Thor replied as he held the younger man to him, among the stickiness and the mess, Thor felt right. It was all right, as it should be and as Thor would always ensure it would be.

**Author's Note:**

> The next chapter is the epilogue and is rated EXPLICIT because it's nothing but a shameless excuse for pR0n. :D


End file.
